A Love Letter To Empowerment

If you walked outside in the streets today you may have seen people resembling each other.

Frowning about the weather.

Sad.

Stressed.

Depressed.

All of us, myself included, experienced a feeling of helplessness and powerlessness throughout life. It is the feeling when things seem tough, when things will never change, when everything seems dark.

Most of us have given up their dreams.

Most of us have given up their self-belief.

Most of us live in denial of our own true potential.

It doesn’t have to be you. Luckily there is a cure.

Empowerment.

Empowerment starts with knowing who you are. It is about knowing what is important to you, what you believe in, what your unique strengths are. Empowerment is knowing who you are, what you want, what you don’t want and bringing yourself out into the world unapologetically the way you are.

Empowerment is the feeling you find when you stop looking outside and start looking inside yourself, only to realize that you have so much more potential you never believed to have. That everything you ever needed was always there. That everything you were seeking was seeking you once you started tapping in your own potential. It always was. It always will.

Imagine what the world would look like if we would believe a little bit more in ourselves.

Imagine what the world would look like if we would be a little bit more good to ourselves.

Imagine how much more loving and caring we would be because we already had found the love for ourselves we were always looking outside.

I truely believe personal empowerment is the gamechanger.

It is empowerment that changes lives. These lives change their families. And these families ultimately change their communities.

Because someone once started to believe in himself and his own potential.

To love. To grow. To be.

The person he always wanted to be.

That person can be you.

What you gonna do?

 

 

When Was The Last Time You Were A Child?

When was the last time you were a child,

when were you free and wild?

Children’s eyes are free to see,

children show us all that we can be.

 

When was the last time you fooled around,

when was the last time you admired the sound

of your laughter, of the voice from your mother

from the noise that comes from the streets at your counter.

Have you ever stopped and began to see,

how magical each moment can be?

 

I wonder,

when was the last time you wandered,

without destination, for the love to explore and discover?

Without a need to arrive, taking in all there is,

Stop, come to a halt –

have you already smelled the roses?

 

When was the last time you embraced a stranger,

when the last time you saw no danger,

When was the last time you danced around,

singing songs you always wanted to be your sound.

 

When was the last time you looked to the sky,

Wondering where those clouds may fly?

When was the last time you believed to jump so high,

Fyling with the birds, enjoying life.

When was the last time you believed to be a scholar or a doctor,

When was the last time you painted dreams in your colour?

 

Children are our greatest teachers,

they could be our greatest preachers.

If life seems rough,

all the magic seems to part,

ask yourself:

When was the last time you did something for the first time?

When was the last time you saw the world from the eyes of a child?

The True Purpose of Life

Life is a test and you pass if you can be true to yourself. To get the first question correct, all you have to know is who you are. A life is just one letter away from a lie.

– Neil Strauss –

Here’s the thing.

When you and I were born, we were innocent. Pure. Beautiful and honest creatures who lived in a state of oneness with each moment.

As we developed our parents and those close to us loaded us with baggage. Some of us kept accumulating more and more of it. Trapped in beliefs and behaviours that kept us stuck the weight became too much to carry on. You became a shadow of the person you once were.

The true purpose of life is to let go of that baggage and become light and pure again.

To let go of the emotions holding you back: all the shame, grief, fear, desire, anger and pride you accumulated over your life.

To question everything you once thought to be true about yourself, people and the world. To let go of all the beliefs telling you that you are not good enough, that people will make fun of you if you show up as you are, that the world is a cruel place.

To let go of your can’t s and realize that what you once thought to be impossible for yourself was all the way possible.

We are onions in life. With each and every experience, life invites us to peel away one layer at a time to direct us inward. To let go of the veil of darkness to ultimately find the light inside ourselves.

On my journey I’ve found that a vital resource to peel away all your layers is your fear.

I used to be the shiest, most introverted guy the planet has ever seen. It was my fear of talking to people that was my greatest blessing. Once I started going out, questioning, challenging every single belief I had about myself, the people and the world, once I started taking action and turn my “I can’t”s into “I can”s my whole world changed. I let go of my fears of not being good enough and rejection. I let go of my beliefs that people were out to get me. I let go of my feelings of shame, grief, fear, anger, pride.

Through my darkest fears I found the brightest light inside myself.

I’ve found the love and acceptance I was looking for all my life.

I’ve found the magic I was looking for all my life.

I’ve found myself again.

And once I changed, everything changed.

Thus I say go into your deepest fear. Face it. Explore it.

Maybe you are a person who has been overweight and from which you suffered all your life. Maybe your health and appearance were the trigger for all the shame, grief, fear, desire, anger and pride in your life.

Maybe your appearance was the trigger for the beliefs you absorbed about yourself, the people and the world, holding you hostage in this way of life you never wanted to live.

Maybe your appearance was your own impossibility all the way in your life.

It may be that your health is the gateway to your own liberation.

Maybe you are a person who has been fearful and not trustworthy of people which brought you a lot of pain in your life. It may be that your fear of people and your fear of intimacy is the gateway to your own liberation.

May you always follow your fear. Beause on the other side of fear lies the part of you you’ve been looking for all your life.

It was in my deepest fears where I found all the holes that made me look for the love, the freedom, the appreciation which made look outside, resembling a thirsty wanderer in the desert.

It was through the transformation in my fears that I healed and sealed these holes.

It was through my deepest fears that I became whole again.

Only to fall down again and realize that there is much more I can learn. 🙂

Remember:

Life is a test and you pass if you can be true to yourself. To get the first question correct, all you have to know is who you are.

And with every experience in your life you are tested to be true to yourself.

To let go of the baggage you’ve been carrying around all your life.

To peel away one more layer that never was you.

To become innocent.

Pure.

Light again.

The Way To Get Your Power Back

Yesterday someone told me something very interesting.

It made me stop what I was doing… and go really deep into myself.

Let’s call this lovely fellow Jake. Jake is that kind of guy you automatically feel drawn to because of his lively energy about him and his positive nature.

As I was enjoying this beautiful summer’s day, facing me with his lively face, Jake turned over to me and said:

“And if I asked you to name all the things that you love, how long would it take for you to name yourself?”

Boom!

Nailed it.

Sit here and ponder on this question for some time.

How many times do we name all the things we love outside of ourselves… and not even think about the magical things about us?

How many times are we searching for validation outside of ourselves to feel better, to feel good, to finally have our cups filled?

If you are like me many times on my journey, we do this way too often.

Because of the power that question brought back to me, I want to invite you to

Stop what you are doing right now.

Sit here… and think about everything you genuinely love and appreciate about yourself.

What personality traits do you like about yourself?

What little things do you like about your physical appearances?

What are good things you’ve done? What are the things you could be proud of yourself?

Honor yourself.

Love yourself.

What you will learn on this journey is that the extent you love your life corresponds very much to the extent you love yourself.

To live a magical life is to be magical.

To be magical is to love yourself.

How did this practice benefit you? Let me know in the comments.

All the blissings to you,

– Luk

 

Surrender or Drown.

Surrender.

Is the hardest thing I had to learn.

Surrender.

Is all I ever had to learn.

Surrender.

Is all you ever have to do.

Surrender.

Is what you will learn.

 

I don’t know about you, but surrender was such a foreign concept to me. Having grown up in the western world, we are taught from a very young age to “take the reins” in our own hands, to “conquer”, to “suck it up and not give in”. It is all about doing more while simultaneously distancing ourselves from letting go of being, letting things go their own course. Especially for the masculine to let go of control is labelled as being weak and a losing game.

As much power lies in getting out of your own way, leaving all the victim stories of yours behind and become an action-taker, you and I know that it is all exciting and empowering. Entrepreneurs and most people in the self-help industry are all about this. At the same time it is an extremely draining way of living. Always going from one achievement to the next. Always keeping things under control. Always be on the go. Always feeding the new story you created for yourself, feeding it endlessly to a new chain you potentially became a slave to and distanced from yourself and other possibilities. The never-ending fear of falling behind if you do less.

Do you feel fulfilled? Is your cup full until it runneth over?

Or do you feel drained? Empty. Fearsome.

I feel you. I’ve been there a very long time.

You see, the problem with the mindset of taking things in our own hands lost sight of one very true nature in our lives: that everything is change, that nothing is constant. That security is an illusion.

Have you ever felt that the more you do, the more you want to control things to turn out your own way, the less they become what you want them to be? The beautifully deceiving thing about doing more is that it gives us a feeling of being in control. Since security is one of our own basic needs amongst others, doing more has always served a purpose, giving us a sense of power and being in control.

Up until the point when things fall apart. And when things fall apart we become like a captain on a wild ocean in his tiny little kanoo which is about to be devoured by the ocean. Frantically we try to bring all the pieces back together so we can move on.

We fight and we fight. Sometimes we manage to get the pieces back together, getting back our fleeting sense of control.

Yet sometimes we drown.

And sometimes drowning is all we needed.

You know the saying: “Life doesn’t give you what you want. Life gives you what you need.”

What if the frustration that you feel, the loss that you experience and the feeling of being stuck in your life are here to teach you an important lesson?

As much as doing brought you here, maybe it is time to learn a new lesson. The lesson of the power to surrender.

What is Surrender?” you may ask.

It’s good that you ask.

Surrender does not mean to give in to every situation you find yourself in. Surrender does not mean to give up meeting the slightest obstacle in your life.

Surrender means Acceptance.

To surrender is to accept everything as it is. To surrender means to accept everything as it is and to be greateful for it.

Any time you find yourself in a difficult situation, don’t suppress the emotion. Don’t fight against it. Let go of your resistance to it and let it flow through you like a river. Let it flow through you and do welcome it. Appreciate the situation you find yourself in. Try to be grateful for it.

Beware of the labels you put on experiences, people or emotions. To call something bad or negative is to get in resistance to it. To be in resistance is to fight reality.

What are you fighting once you resist? The label that your mind put on something external. Propelling you into a never-ending  fight of madness. Grasping on to things outside of you to form them in your own image of right or wrong. Falling back into the illusion of control and security. Becoming a slave to your fears and insecurities. You resist what is. You suffer.

Thus to fight reality is insanity. After all this urge is what brought you here.

Do you know the saying that “less is more”?

What if less doing and more being is the answer to your questions?

Lukas, how do I move into being?” I hear you say.

What helped me along my journey are many things. And they all go by the principle of surrender.

First, it is to accept everything as it is. Accept my present moment and anything that arises in it. Accept my past moments and everything that came out of it. To let go of any urge I feel to change the situation. To let go of the urge to change my emotion. To let go of the urge of changing my thought. To let go of the need to do something. To simply be with the situation and emotion I find myself in and experience. To sit with it, not judging it as good nor bad. Meditation is a tool that helped me tremendously developing this skill. Try it, it will work wonders for you.

Second, it is to be grateful for anything in my present moment and anything that arises in it. Be also grateful and appreciative of everything that happened in the past. Additionally you can ask yourself what good could be found in a certain situation. Dig deeper, and find the diamonds in the mud. The more you dig, the more you find. The more diamonds you find, the more radiant the situation will be, benefitting you in a major way.

Third, it is to be open to any feeling that arises inside my body. To feel it. To give it time to evolve. To listen to it. To feel what it wants me to feel.

Fourth, act. Once a feeling arises inside of you and you sit with it, you go with its flow, now you act upon it. Here comes the part of taking the reins in the hands, to become active. Not anymore of resistance to change a situation, but from the place of appreciation and guidance by your own feeling.

The magic formula to surrender is to

Let go and accept + be grateful +  feel + act upon feeling coming from inside.

Once you surrender you become a catalyst for change. Life does not happen to you. Life does not happen by you. Life begins to happen through you. And with that everything changes.

 

 

To surrender makes you a much happier person.

To surrender makes you a loving person.

To surrender brings you back to your intuition.

To surrender moves you into your authenticity.

To surrender brings you back to your bliss.

To surrender is to follow your bliss.

 

I wish you all the blissings that will arise from it.

What is one thing you can let go of and surrender? Let me know in the comments below.

 

 

 

It All Starts With The Charge

Have you ever been on vacation and felt a sensation inside yourself, that pointed you to do something different than you planned? Have you ever given in to this sensation and realized that what evolved because of it was so much better than the plan you initially set out to go for in the first place?

That same feeling is the feeling you get when things feel right. That same feeling is the feeling you get when things make sense to the point that you know that it is right, even though everyone else (and your head probably the most) tells you it is the worst to do.

That same feeling is the feeling writers get when things seem flying to them and they feel the urge to bring them out of them, to express them in whatever shape or form. In fact, it is the feeling that brought me to write these lines in the first place.

Whatever speaks inside of you, it wants to be spoken.

Is it a truth you found for yourself and want to share with the world?

Is it a note that came through you and wants to be expressed in music?

Is it an idea of a world that you want to live in?

Whatever it is, listen to this sensation, literally sit there and FEEL into it.

What does it want to tell you?

Do you understand it?

If you are like me on my journey, it is a language that most of us have totally forgotten.

It is the language of the heart.

Listening to the heart is like listening to another language.

Some things you understand out of context, other words you don’t understand from the start.

Yet as with any other foreign language, you get better and better at understanding it any time you ask for the meaning of it.

The same applies to the language of your heart.

Whenever you feel that sensation in your heart or gut that pointes you to something, simply try to allow it to come through you, to literally speak through you.

It may be that feelings will come up, or maybe words or even pictures. Whatever it is, give that feelings and words that come up the room to be there and get to know them just as you would get to know a new person.

And with every sensation that you feel inside you that is telling you something else than your head is telling you, let go for once what your heart is telling you and move with what your body is telling you.

Just as with the vacation plans you initially had, the plans that you changed for the gut feeling that you had and realised that whatever came out of it was so much more of what you needed than any plan you ever had; you may very well realise that what you will find by following your gut feeling is so much more of what you need than the idea you have in your mind what might make you happy.

The more your do it, the better you get at listening and speaking the language of the heart. By staying with it and listening to it non-judgementally you learn to listen to it. By following this sensation and speaking what feels right to you and doing what feels right for you, you learn to speak the language of the heart. That is the way of manifestation from the heart.

To listen and speak the language of the heart is to be yourself.

To listen and speak the language of the heart is all your parents, your friends, the world want you to do.

To listen and speak the language of the heart is to follow your bliss.

You have treasures inside you. Treasures you burried in your heart for so long.

I think it is time you allow yourself to bring them forth.

Stop living life with your words unspoken, songs unsung.

Be yourself in a world that always tried you to be something else.

Not because it wanted the worst for you. But to learn to speak the language you have forgotten to speak.

What does your heart tell you?

Speak the language of your heart.

 

Words. of Bliss.

Words.

Words are rarely spoken.

So many times unwoven.

In my life these are the colours of the paintings I wanted to paint so lovely,

never to be broken.

 

How many times have I talked myself out of it.

How many times have I sold myself short of it.

Because of the words I told myself,

Words that I, words of

Not being enough

Not being smart enough

Not being ready enough.

 

Now I realize more than ever that I have waited again and again.

Life is running through my veins, ready to be spent.

Take the time you need, take care of yourself,

For what you take care of is going to take care of you.

 

Follow your bliss is what life says.

Follow your bliss is what your heart says.

Follow your bliss is the only strategy there will ever be.

Follow your bliss is your way.

 

The Greatest Secret You Were Not Told

The greatest battle of all time didn’t happen in Troy, and it didn’t happen in the Normandy.

The greatest battle of all time happens right now.

The greatest battle happens inside of you.

It is you versus the world’s expectations.

The World’s Expectations

You and I have experienced the outer pressures of the world.

The expectation to marry someone. The expectation to go to college. The expectation to follow the crowd.

An expectation isn’t per se something bad. However, it turns into poison once you make the world’s expectation your own expectation. Once you make someone else’s world view your own, you start to look outside yourself for validation. You begin to  doubt yourself. The feeling of being not good enough creeps into your heart.

“Dress like this, behave like that. Think like this, follow that.”

No, thanks. I’m good.

As the saying goes: “Check yourself, before you wreck yourself.”

Once you let go of what the world has told you what you are, you step back into who you really are. Your natural, beautiful authenticity.

The question remains:

How do we let go of society’s expectations?

Here is what helped me along my journey.

1. Strip down. Get naked.

Did you ever watch children play?

They express themselves freely. They dance freely. They laugh freely. They question freely. Children follow their bliss day in, day out.

Did you ever watch grown-ups play?

Seldom do I.

Grown-ups express what they think they should say. They stay stiffly. They doubt. They accept things as they are.

Seriously, WHAT HAPPENED?

Nothing speacial, a very natural thing.

Children are like sponges. Soaking the world in like sponges, the children took on one idea after another like clothes. And with every piece of clothing they took on themselves, the weight got heavier and heavier. Soon the weight felt burdensome. Soon we didn’t know anymore who we are, because all we saw were the layers we put on.

It is ok that you and I are slaves to others, because we soaked in ideas as we grew up like sponges. We picked up ideas from our parents, our friends, teachers, media. These became the ideas of what’s “right” and “wrong” for us.

Next time you express an oppinion or think of an idea – ask yourself where it comes from. Realize that most of your attitudes are not your own. Most of them are other’s attitudes that you keep on carrying through your life.

Whenever you spot an attitude or an idea about yourself or the world – question it. Ask yourself if you really are that bad at school, if you really are that shy of a person, if you really need to have a well-paid job to live a good life. Or if this ideas come from experiences you had which made you belief that you “are” bad at school, shy and have to have a well-paid job to live a good life.

Layer by layer you strip off that piece of clothing from you. And the more you do, the more you step away from the illusion of who you thought you were into the core of who you really are. That is how you free yourself. And once you begin to free yourself, you stop absorbing expectatios of the world and heal yourself.

2. Accept yourself

You have sides to you that are unique. Sides that some people might have said are great about you, others are weird to you. Own all of them. Stop fitting in.

To love and accept yourself is not only the greatest gift you can make to yourself. To accept and love yourself is the greatest gift you can make to others. When you are fully you, you allow people to be themselves, too. And there never has been a greater need to be ourselves in a world that tried to make us somebody else.

What is something about you that only you can do?

What is something about you that means something special to you?

Question your need to be popular. Because when you try to be popular, you stay at the mercy of other people’s judgement. You cage yourself in.

Stop trying to fit in.

As the great Krishnamurti once said:

“It is no measure of health to be well-adjusted to a profoundly sick society.”

Most people are born originals, but die as a copy. Stop being one of them. Be your original.

Be the gift that you are to the world. Own yourself. Accept yourself. Love yourself.

To love yourself is to be courageous.

To love yourself is to be free.

Love yourself and you belong to the most free and courageous people will ever know.

3. Stop following the Crowd

It takes courage to be yourself. And it takes courage to love yourself. Which is hard because we so often still compare ourselves to the world’s expectations.

To stop following the crowd takes to start following your path. This path doesn’t go outwards; it goes inwards.

What helps to connect with who you are is to meditate a lot. Is to be in nature. Is to face your fears and transcend them. To build the courage to follow your path is to build an inner relationship with yourself.

4. Follow Your Heart

“I think, therefore I am.”

As important as the quote by RenĂ© Descartes was for western civilization, as much it contains the damage we deal to ourselves by following the world’s expectations.

In the western world we are so much in our heads that we lost the connection to our body, our heart. We need to get in touch with ourselves again. To meditate, to be in nature, to travel and face your fears are ways to get out of your head and the routine that you were telling yourself all life long into a new story which lines lurk inside you.

To follow your heart is a risk, but it is a risk worth taking. You will experience pressure and may experience pain to follow your heart’s calling. But you will also experience much more pain and even greater resistance when you neglect to follow your heart. It is a much greater pain to die having lived a life that was not true to yourself than to dared to be yourself.

To not follow your heart is to leave the world having left your song unsung.

To follow your heart is to follow your bliss. And it is the best thing you can do to yourself, because that way you stop living to the world’s expectations and start living a life that is worth living for you.

Do something that matters.

Be yourself.

Love yourself.

Follow your bliss.

Have a wonderful day.

– Lukas

My Little Secret

I want to share a little secret with you.

I. Love. Being. Naked.

Be it sleeping naked in bed, spending the whole day naked with your partner, or running shirtless around.

Whatever you may think.

I don’t care.

It feels so good to be naked.

It feels just like it should be.

I feel connected to my own nature and everything that is around me when I’m naked.

I truely love being naked.

Especially when it comes to one thing.

Authenticity.

Being authentic means to know who you are and to communicate it ithrough your thoughts, words and actions to the world.

Give the world all you’ve got.

But still, why do we hold it back?

Why do we sometimes hang out with people we don’t like? Why do we agree to appointments we don’t want to be in? Why do we say ‘I love you’, even though our hearts don’t say so? Why do we choose a job we hate to our guts and leave our passions on the floor?

It has one word.

And it has taken on like a virus throughout society.

Do you want to know what it is?

Conformity.

We conform in our lives, because not being able to determine all consequences of our actions scares us – sometimes to death.

Conformity means security to many of us. But there is one little thing your parents might not have told you about security.

It is an illusion.

We all are part in this thing called Life. And it is a wild thing. Sometimes it scares you, other times it embraces you, then it knocks your feet off the ground, and eventually it amazes you with its miracles and its beauty.

Today you live, you may have a partner, you may have a house, you may have a well paid job which allows you to live relatively on high standards.

Tomorrow you may lose one thing or lose it all. You may suffer a heart attack, your partner may cheat on you, catastrophes may destroy your house and an economical crisis may melt down your job like a fire burns down a cigarette in your mouth. It may go all to smoke.

And these are not special cases. These are things that happen to thousands and millions of people every day.

So why hold anything back?

It is time that you kick out the word “security” out of your vocabulary and start to embrace one thing.

Vulnerability.

Embrace your vulnerability and jump headfirst into the waves of life.

Be completely you and tell people how much you care about them.

Go out and tell the cashier what a beautiful smile she has.

Kick out those poisonous people out of your life and spend more time with the ones who nurture you.

Go and do something that matters to you.

And most importantly say out loud what you believe in.

Let every thought, every word, and every action be a witness to what you believe in.

These are signs. And we live in times where people seek desperately for people who believe in what they believe in.

When you begin to be a little more authentic each day, magical things begin to happen:

People respect you for who you are. People who believe in what you believe in begin to stream into your life. People begin to see the change they wanted to see in the world.

Through You.

More Sex. More Love. More Freedom. More Happiness. Countless opportunities.

Isn’t it all you want to have?

Give the world all you’ve got and start being more authentic.

Be naked.

3 Revolutionary Lessons I Learnt This Week

Do you know these times when just everything falls into place? When so much good comes into your life that you don’t know what to say?

I must share something with you today.

After this incredible week I learnt three important lessons we all must learn in life.

Here they are, sweet and simple.

3 Lessons

You and I have dreams.

You and I have ambitions.

And you and I have doubts.

Doubts of ever making it, doubts of our goals, doubts of ourselves.

Do you also know these doubts?

Now let me tell you something.

All these doubts have one common denominator.

It’s the FEAR OF NOT BEING GOOD ENOUGH.

We all are guilty of this, and I fail at overcoming it many many times.

“Who am I to give advice? Who am I to build a business? Who am I to write a book? Who am I to change something in the world?”

Do these questions resonate with you?

Alright.

Now stop.

Take a deep breath.

And give me an honest answer:

WHY NOT YOU?

Why not you to build a business? You have ideas, experiences, skills and talents nobody else has in this world. Go and create something to add value to the world! Because you can!

Why not you to write a book? You have a voice nobody else has. You have a view that’s refreshing to this world. Go and write that book! The world waits to hear your voice and your song needs to be sung! Go do it. Because you can!

Why not you to coach someone? You have a story nobody else has and experiences nobody else has made. To you you may not seem great enough to give someone advice, but there is this one person who looks up to you, a person who needs advice you have. Go and share it. Because you can!

Lesson #1: “Why not me?” Realize that you are already good enough. Give yourself permission to realize that you have everything you need for your dream, and start from there. Give it a shot!

When you’ve tackled the first lesson, the next sweetie comes around the corner which will rock your world.

Lesson #2: Ask!

Realize that there are so many people that understand you and who are willing to help you. But guess what, they cannot look into your head! I dare you to ask. You will be amazed how many people will love to help you.

With every enterprise you will ever take in your life you will soon realize that you need help.

If you find yourself at crossroads and need advice, if you don’t have the money to keep going, or if you just need someone to listen.

ASK PEOPLE.

Imagine you had a company and a young fellow with a vivid spirit and ambition would come to you and ask you for advice. Wouldn’t you give it to him?

Imagine your daughter would come to you and ask you for money, because she wants to start an organization to help people. Wouldn’t you give it to her?

You exactly know the feeling when you help people.

It feels good, huh?

It goes much deeper than that.

IT FEELS GREAT!

Guess what: as much as you love to help people, people love to help you.

Give people the opportunity to help you. They will thank you for that.

And ultimately they will help you.

Lost but not least –

Lesson #3: Learn to say No!

Be it the negative voice in your head, a request from a friend or a time sucking activity such as facebook.

When you want to accomplish your dream, learn to say No more often.

And this is not a bad thing.

Many people mistake saying No with being selfish.

A common mistake I often made and still make to this day.

The ability to say no stems from self-love and self-care.

I’m not saying you should not help your friend when he or she needs it or that you should not go out anymore.

All I’m saying is you should start saying No a little bit more often.

Probably you went out the fifth time in a row when all you really wanted to do was write down that idea you had for your book.

Or you answer any request people make and find yourself irritated that you never find time for yourself and what matters to you.

If that is the case, it is time to embrace the Power of Saying No.

Start simple by telling your friend next time that you would love to go out with him or would love to help her now, but you have to finish this thing first and then you will attend him or her.

It’s a paradox, but the more you say no, the more people respect you.

Sounds weird, doesn’t it?

It’s simply because you broadcast that you have self-worth.

In all our honesty, deep down within we admire people who have self-worth and we would love to have some more of it, too.

And when this person who doesn’t have always time makes time for us, we feel extremely grateful and share real quality time together.

Instead of looking up to this person, be that person.

People will thank you for it.

And your future self will thank you the most for it.

Real Story: How 3 Lessons Changed My Life

I was fortunate to make a dream become a reality this week.

All my life at uni I was looking up to those people who had a scholarship.

“If I only had it, too!”

Over the last years, that voice kept singing in my head over, and over, and over again.

But I didn’t feel good enough.

And because of that I didn’t want to ask people for help or information, because I thought it would’ve been useless.

And I kept going out and doing things that were fun, but didn’t matter to me as much as receiving that scholarship I desired to have.

One day, I made a change.

Instead of asking “Who am I to receive a scholarship?” I asked myself “After all I’ve done, WHY NOT ME?”

That idea thrilled me.

So I got up, got out of my house and was willing to get something.

I asked people who had scholarships.

I asked the financing counselor at my uni how to apply for a scholarship.

I asked my professors to write a commendatory letter.

I asked a really good friend to help me write my application for a scholarship.

And then I said no.

No to going out when I felt I had to work on my application.

No to my doubts I was not good enough.

No to time sucking activities.

I applied.

And I waited.

And waited. And waited.

Yesterday, I received a letter from my uni.

My heart jumped and raced on a highway.

This was the moment of truth.

I took a deep breath, opened the envelope. And there it was, written in magical letters:

“Hereby we would like to thank you for your interest in our scholarship program, and are glad to announce that you have been accpeted for the scholarship program.”

I was at loss of words. I jumped and cried out loud, embraced in bliss and filled with gratitude.

Here I was, holding in my hand evidence for something I once thought impossible to be possible.

All because of three little things I did differently this time.

Thank you.

In gratitude-

Lukas