Stop Overdoing It!

Can personal development be bad for you?

Not exactly. But you can. Once you become obsessed with personal development.

On the way to become your best self you take in all those principals from experts like a food-addicted person eats muffins, eggs, anything for breakfast. You clutter all those promising principles

within, thinking that knowing about them will make you your best person.

Let me share you something:

Personal development is supposed to make you better. It is not supposed to make you best.

Because you never will. Perfection does not exist.

Take your personal education seriously, but don’t become too rigid and overdo it. Otherwise it will harm you more than it will do you good.

As any other obsession, it will feed on you and start becoming the only vision you see life through. I can tell you this, because I’ve been through this.

What became an enrichment in your life, becomes a burden that pulls you down.

“I’m falling back!“

“I am supposed to be better by now!“

“Why am I not feeling better?“

You stop living your life and start living a life like a robot – lifeless, sterile, void of feelings.

When you try to opperate on principles all the time, you try to behave like robot.

Which you aren’t.

You are a human being that laughs, cries, falls, lives with all its strengths and weaknesses. Your strengths and weaknesses make you beautiful. So embrace them.

Yes, your life may need some guidance. And you do very well with your intention to make it better. So put on a corsette.

But don’t pull it too tightly.

Life, happiness, creativity – it won’t flow when you limit yourself too much.

Take the first step and work on yourself.

One change at a time.

When you succeed in one change, move on to the next.

And then to the next. And the next.

As soon as you learn about something worth applying, work on that change only until you succeed.

During that process, allow yourself to fail. Fall out of line.

Take the first step, grow, fail, fall, smile, get up again and move on.

Enjoy the process of falling back and getting better. It makes you the better person.

Every once in a while, take a moment and look back.

Look how far you’ve got.

This is how great you are.



When opportunity strikes to do better

This week I got very fortunate: Being back at uni I got the opportunity to speak to the audience of an institution from my hometown university who was interested in my thoughts on going abroad. Gladly I accepted this offer. I touched upon some topics I did not touch upon in my last post which I’d like to add and share with you. Here’s what I want to bring to the table additionaly.

My best investment

Once one of my mentors Mr. Les Brown said that “you don’t get out life what you want, you get out of life who you are”. In order to achieve your goals and reach your dreams you must become your best self. If you want attractions in your life you must become attractive to them.

To me going abroad was one of the best investments I could do for my personal development. Not only did I take the time to find out for myself what I really want in life, but I also got the opportunity to live situations and draw lessons from life I could not draw back home. Going abroad may not be the easy way to go sometimes, but remember this: if you have the chance to walk two paths in life, decide for the harder one. It will always make you a better person.

What killed more lifes than Death itself

Quite often did people ask me about my travels. Most of the time I would hear things like “I always wanted to do this”, to which I would respond enthusiastically “Great! Do it!” And then I would hear the answer why they never get up to get their dreams: excuses. “What if I”, “only if”, “but” … you name it. The only reason why people don’t live the life they want has a name, and it has killed more lifes than death itself: fear.

When you get a sense of fear, your brain usually creates a worst case scenario. You get trapped into fear paralysis. Don’t let the dog become a beast that grips you in its fangs.

Next time you’re confronted with fear, ask yourself the question “What could happen?” Most of the time you will quickly realize that you may fall, but eventually you will recover.
Now ask yourself the following question “What if I do nothing?” If the answer to this question horrifies you, you know what you have to do.

Because the worst thing in life is to live a life of regret. Pain is temporary, regret lasts forever. And trust me, living a life of regret is the last thing you want to do in your life.

Frankly, most people I talked to, and me included, we all had our fears and doubts before going abroad. But, and this is the key, we did it, because we believed in its good for ourselves. As a matter of fact, we got rewarded beyond measure. Eventually, all our lifes changed for the better. Why? Because we became better.

Life offers you abundance, if you are willing to pay the price. Taking courage is the first step to claim your birth right to be free and receive that fulfilling abundance.

Date with your chimney

Before I leave you for today, I want you to do the following exercise:

Imagine you are 70 years old and in your last days of living. As you sit in front of your chimney, you look back on a fulfilled life. What do you see?

  • Which places did you see?
  • What experiences have you made?
  • How many languages did you learn?
  • Which people did you meet?
  • What books have you written?
  • What person have you become?

Write everything down that you come up with as precisely as you can and give it dates until when you will achieve this goal. Now you have a good overview of the things you want to do in life. Get going and start working on just one goal. Soon you will find yourself succeed in that goal which will propell you to move on to other goals. It will not take very long and you will see a major change in your life.

Live your life fully so you become happy truely. There is nothing more fulfilling in the world than to know that you have lived every moment fully.