Stop Overdoing It!

Can personal development be bad for you?

Not exactly. But you can. Once you become obsessed with personal development.

On the way to become your best self you take in all those principals from experts like a food-addicted person eats muffins, eggs, anything for breakfast. You clutter all those promising principles

within, thinking that knowing about them will make you your best person.

Let me share you something:

Personal development is supposed to make you better. It is not supposed to make you best.

Because you never will. Perfection does not exist.

Take your personal education seriously, but don’t become too rigid and overdo it. Otherwise it will harm you more than it will do you good.

As any other obsession, it will feed on you and start becoming the only vision you see life through. I can tell you this, because I’ve been through this.

What became an enrichment in your life, becomes a burden that pulls you down.

“I’m falling back!“

“I am supposed to be better by now!“

“Why am I not feeling better?“

You stop living your life and start living a life like a robot – lifeless, sterile, void of feelings.

When you try to opperate on principles all the time, you try to behave like robot.

Which you aren’t.

You are a human being that laughs, cries, falls, lives with all its strengths and weaknesses. Your strengths and weaknesses make you beautiful. So embrace them.

Yes, your life may need some guidance. And you do very well with your intention to make it better. So put on a corsette.

But don’t pull it too tightly.

Life, happiness, creativity – it won’t flow when you limit yourself too much.

Take the first step and work on yourself.

One change at a time.

When you succeed in one change, move on to the next.

And then to the next. And the next.

As soon as you learn about something worth applying, work on that change only until you succeed.

During that process, allow yourself to fail. Fall out of line.

Take the first step, grow, fail, fall, smile, get up again and move on.

Enjoy the process of falling back and getting better. It makes you the better person.

Every once in a while, take a moment and look back.

Look how far you’ve got.

This is how great you are.

-Lukas

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How Do You Get Through Your Day?

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Whenever you have a rough day, watch this.

Richie’s story touched me deeply. I bet it did the same with you.

Next time you and I complain, put up your hand and start counting your blessings:

1) I’m alive.

2) I have family.

3) I got my health.

4) If I can look up I can get up.

5) The best is yet to come.

If someone tells you you can’t do it, show them how you do it. Find your Richie Parker within.

Don’t listen to people who try to tell you what you can do and what not.

Impossible is nothing.

Do your next step toward your goal today and show the world that you are possible.

Live fully, laugh often, choose courageously.

-Lukas

The Dance

The bright song of birds filled the air with joy outside. It was one of those bright shiny days people tend to reminisce about when they grow up: Kids played outside with their families, couples savoured the richness of every moment as the sun bathed their shapes in light. It was a beautiful day.

Not far away was a hospital. Inside that hospital one particular person was lying.

It was you.

Imagine yourself lying after an accident for months in hospital. Rushing all your life listening to the voice of others without taking time to listen to the whisper of your heart, you find yourself lying in bed alone as you gaze outside the window.

Silence.

First there was pain. Then came struggle. Now there is peace.

All of a sudden you realize that you’ve got all the time you ever wanted for yourself. One by one, you rediscover your dreams and needs: Dreams you thought were long forgotten, needs you thought were of lower necessity. You flipped the other side of the coin and now it’s shining all for you. Accepting life, you realize: Solitude is treasure, therein lies gratitude of high measure.

Tell me, who is happier: the person who accepts the moment of being for months in hospital fully, or the person who, day in, day out, is running from deadline to deadline, regarding every moment as a means to an end and rushing desperately on vacation from one place to the next to see the most possible and trying to catch life in all those snapshots only for once.

The Miracle of Acceptance

There is a cathargic power to clarity in acceptance. Total acceptance of all there is. Forgiving means to hold no resistance towards life – to allow life to live through you. Where acceptance is, there lies clarity. And where clarity is, your way unfolds clearly in front of you. When you clench to the past or live in the future, you can’t embrace what life offers you now. Your past must not be your future. But since the future is determined by thine decisions alone you make now, you have to be in the now as present as you can.

Things are as they are. Conditions are neither good, nor bad. They all become what we call “good” or “bad” as soon as we attribute them as such in our minds. Hence the best tip for you is to accept things simply as they are. Whenever you are confronted with a  “bad” situation: hold on, become centered and accept everything as it is. Just accept. It makes you see clearer in the abundance of life you dived into long time ago and which clouds your inner eye to make a decision, any decision. Make sure to be of clear mind, that is to accept all there is first, in order to make the right decisions for yourself.

“I don’t like to indulge to everything that happens around me. I want to fight for my reality”, someone may protest now.

Acceptance doesn’t mean to indulge to everything that happens to you, but rather come to a halt and gain a neutral view of your situation in order to make the best decision for yourself. You are right, there are things you must devote your whole self to, things that demand everything from you, things  by which you truely become happy. However, in order to recognize these things, things you believe in and things worth fighting for, you must come to silence first. Remember: Where silence is, there is you. And where you are, therein is your shining star.IMG_6579

The Dancer

Life is a dancer: when you dance with him, every moment becomes ease in the duet of the two of you. It’s one of the those moments when you follow your heart and everything works out exactly as you want it. And he will kick on your feet, you will stumble and sometimes you may even fall. But as with every dance, the more your practice it, the better you and your partner become. It’s the same with life: when things get hard, don’t try to quit. It’s just a step on your foot to test how much you want to embrace the dance with life and be rewarded with its joy.

Once you step outside of this duet, life and you seperate into heavy being. When this happens, step again into duet with life. Let life be the man and let him lead you. Wherever you belong – life will bring you there.

See life as a friend. Work with him, instead of working against him.

Sing with him when he sings.

Cry with him when he cries.

Dance with him when he dances with you.

And live with him, for he lives within you.

When opportunity strikes to do better

This week I got very fortunate: Being back at uni I got the opportunity to speak to the audience of an institution from my hometown university who was interested in my thoughts on going abroad. Gladly I accepted this offer. I touched upon some topics I did not touch upon in my last post which I’d like to add and share with you. Here’s what I want to bring to the table additionaly.

My best investment

Once one of my mentors Mr. Les Brown said that “you don’t get out life what you want, you get out of life who you are”. In order to achieve your goals and reach your dreams you must become your best self. If you want attractions in your life you must become attractive to them.

To me going abroad was one of the best investments I could do for my personal development. Not only did I take the time to find out for myself what I really want in life, but I also got the opportunity to live situations and draw lessons from life I could not draw back home. Going abroad may not be the easy way to go sometimes, but remember this: if you have the chance to walk two paths in life, decide for the harder one. It will always make you a better person.

What killed more lifes than Death itself

Quite often did people ask me about my travels. Most of the time I would hear things like “I always wanted to do this”, to which I would respond enthusiastically “Great! Do it!” And then I would hear the answer why they never get up to get their dreams: excuses. “What if I”, “only if”, “but” … you name it. The only reason why people don’t live the life they want has a name, and it has killed more lifes than death itself: fear.

When you get a sense of fear, your brain usually creates a worst case scenario. You get trapped into fear paralysis. Don’t let the dog become a beast that grips you in its fangs.

Next time you’re confronted with fear, ask yourself the question “What could happen?” Most of the time you will quickly realize that you may fall, but eventually you will recover.
Now ask yourself the following question “What if I do nothing?” If the answer to this question horrifies you, you know what you have to do.

Because the worst thing in life is to live a life of regret. Pain is temporary, regret lasts forever. And trust me, living a life of regret is the last thing you want to do in your life.

Frankly, most people I talked to, and me included, we all had our fears and doubts before going abroad. But, and this is the key, we did it, because we believed in its good for ourselves. As a matter of fact, we got rewarded beyond measure. Eventually, all our lifes changed for the better. Why? Because we became better.

Life offers you abundance, if you are willing to pay the price. Taking courage is the first step to claim your birth right to be free and receive that fulfilling abundance.

Date with your chimney

Before I leave you for today, I want you to do the following exercise:

Imagine you are 70 years old and in your last days of living. As you sit in front of your chimney, you look back on a fulfilled life. What do you see?

  • Which places did you see?
  • What experiences have you made?
  • How many languages did you learn?
  • Which people did you meet?
  • What books have you written?
  • What person have you become?

Write everything down that you come up with as precisely as you can and give it dates until when you will achieve this goal. Now you have a good overview of the things you want to do in life. Get going and start working on just one goal. Soon you will find yourself succeed in that goal which will propell you to move on to other goals. It will not take very long and you will see a major change in your life.

Live your life fully so you become happy truely. There is nothing more fulfilling in the world than to know that you have lived every moment fully.

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Set your Sails and Go into the World

We all have dreams. And dreams are meant to  to be lived. Going abroad and travelling the world was one such dream of mine.

One day I knew it was time. So I took the reins into my hands – and set out into the world.

Many times people ask me how I did it. In the same breath they tell me that they always dreamed about going abroad but considered themselves too afraid of doing it. Instead of enjoying the itch and digging deeper into their dream they drown that exact dream with their doubts the moment they think about it.

I dedicate today’s post to the doubter and waverer inside all of us. If you find yourself eaten by doubt and dragged by fear, it is time to breathe some fresh air. This is for you.

Setting Sails

How did my journey start?

Fairly simple: By doing one first step. I decided to set out into the world and bring my life with everything I was at that time to a halt. I wanted a break from life and embrace Life.

Before you set out for a journey you may not know the course. Know that I also did not know my course. Yet that does not matter. The only thing that matters is your destination. Once you know where you want to go, Life will guide you exactly to where you want to go. And if you don’t know where you want to go, knowing where you don’t want to go can be just as important. Every situation you come into, be it better or worse in your eyes, will be the best situation you can be in at that very moment.  In every moment Life wants to teach you something – embrace it and listen to its whisper.

Truth be told my destination was Life. I set out into the world to become Life’s best student. As I was trying to shoot for the stars I landed on the moon.

Going into the World

Going abroad I met  the most inspiring people I was fortunate to cross my path with. A big majority of people you meet travelling and living abroad are the positive people: people who speak of opportunity, people who are hungry for the world. People who settle for nothing but the best. Many of these people became close friends of mine and I would not trade our friendship for anything in the world.

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Going abroad I saw places of beauty I never thought I would see in my life. Places of colour and variety that were so vibrant, their beauty sang right to my heart. The moments that took my breath away were infinite, yet showed they all to me what Life has in it.

Going abroad I made experiences I would not have made staying home. The world embraced me with arms wide open. Shaped in light, I got molded by Life.

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Going abroad I can truely say: I’ve found my better self.

Of course, sometimes times can get rough. But if I’m given the choice to have rough times back home or in a different country lying under palm trees at the beach savoring the richness of Life I always would choose the latter. Wouldn’t you?

Embrace the Lessons of Life

1. Decide for your dream and simply do the first step. It’s always easier than you think. Speaking for myself, it was simply attending an information evening of a travel agency. Compared to the fear I had before doing this first step, the rest took care almost by itself.

2. Don’t spend your life waiting, but spend your life living. Don’t wait your dreams to be lived, because they will not be realised on their own. Your dreams are nothing without their best ingredient, they are nothing without you. You are the gold and it is you who makes your dreams shine.

Decide to live your life living and to you everything will be given. Do the first step and life will take care of you – if you are willing to.